What Happened to Me?

is it possible to experience a mid-life crisis
in a person's mid-20s?

i am confused about so much of myself
that i feel lost.
there is so much of how i feel
that i still can't even explain,
except by saying it is not my normal.

am i in a good place?
i don't stress anymore.
i am DEFINITELY NOT depressed.
yet,
i feel like somethings not right.

never in my life have i been a guy
that doesn't really care about a woman's feelings/emotions;
i always wanted to be better than the best man i could be.
now,
i don't really care wassup.
i am with someone,
and yet i have an urge to indulge in others.
what makes it worse is
i have no valid reasoning:
my girl is beautiful,
has a beautiful personality,
clicks with me so well,
enjoys every part of me.
i have no major complaints (remembering that no one is perfect).
and yet,
the only explaination i can give
as to what reason i would indulge is
just because...
that's not me.
never has been.
so is this enough to prove that
something is not right with me??
well how about the fact that
i seem to have only two moods nowadays:
either "blah" or happy-go-lucky.
there is so much going on in my life right now,
and yet i feel no stress at all.
in speaking with a friend of mine,
her diagnosis was
i am getting to a point in my life
where i don't care about anything.
could this be true?
what's even crazier,
i tried to pinpoint what i seem to think of most often,
and it seems to be video games.
wtf??
how much of a loser am i?
i seem to only care about playing my xbox.
i don't get it.
what's wrong with me?
add this to the equation:
i have this random urge
to throw a dart at a map of the US
and pick up and move there
to just start from scratch.
wouldn't matter if i knew anyone there or not.
i also thought about taking a job overseas
just for the hell of it.
why do i feel so damn lost??




i feel as though nothing makes sense in my life.
now my girl is upset with me.
one of my friends has gotten out of pocket
and is on the verge of being completely cut out of my life.
i have no plans nor ideas for my future anymore.
what the hell is wrong with me??